🔗 Share this article

“Well, the situation is pretty dire here. Our recommendation is all of our clients to commit their entire holdings into tinned provisions and hunting rifles.” That bit of sage advice comes from the Brain Gremlin – a scientifically altered, speaking, bespectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that overruns Manhattan’s high-tech Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. On the surface, it’s nothing more than an investment tip from one monster to another. Yet, in a strange manner, it’s also remarkably sound life advice. Truly, listen to my reasoning.

When situations deteriorate, the most counterproductive action you can do is view events with undue solemnity. The Brain Gremlin comprehends this. Actually, the majority of the dentally-gifted beasts that occupy Dante’s wild 1990 film (debateably his greatest) possess the same wry, meta funny bone regarding the hazy boundary separating daily routine and pure pandemonium. It’s one element of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that maintains my loyalty – and the older I get, it’s the theme that strikes the deepest chord.

An Early Life Fixation

Of course, my attachment to this movie didn’t start on such an philosophical plane. In my youth, we only had a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Among them were Gremlins and its follow-up, the latter housed in a bulky previously-rented case almost certainly acquired from an non-chain rental store and boasting growling monsters on its worn-out artwork. I was instantly captivated and these films quickly proceeded lodging themselves inside my young, susceptible psyche. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my youthful watching schedule.

Dante’s first film typically gets all the accolades, thanks mostly because of its reputation as a partly frightening holiday classic – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. However, its successor rarely gets the same level of elevated esteem, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d never miss an opportunity to watch Gremlins 2. During bright summer vacations, I’d seclude myself indoors and stick it on. When I obtained my very own TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Over time, it ingrained itself in my mental framework. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they didn’t seem to mind.

Hidden Rewards and Societal Nuggets

As I grew, new revelations enhanced frequent screenings, amplifying the pleasure of watching small emerald creatures joyously wreck a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused development mogul and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was inspired directly by future president Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) echoing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Thankfully, Clamp has more heart than his genuine article inspiration.

The “apocalyptic” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was modeled after a real-life “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner as a contingency for the world actually met its demise. I noticed how Dante went out of his way to film alternate cuts of a meta sequence where Gremlins seize control of the actual feature in progress. A version for theaters, one for VHS and TV, each offering a winking bit of self-referential entertainment sorcery prior to the concept being mainstream.

An Enduring Influence

While it was makeup maestro Rick Baker’s wonderfully grotesque creatures that captured my attention as a child, this hidden treasure maintained my fascination as an adult. In time, I even spoke to Dante about it myself and he had no hesitation revealing to me he made the movie with the specific aim of mocking those who loved its goofy-but-heartfelt predecessor and wanted more. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he happily revealed. This Looney Tunes-esque rebelliousness and resolve to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses obviously desired, only made me love it even more.

When I experienced a sudden family bereavement recently, I was surprised to find that, during my deepest grief, all I desired to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Strange, isn’t it? Perhaps not. The nostalgic calm it offered was essential to dilute my mind’s sadness sludge – but the stuff it had bestowed upon me as an adult were just as useful.

Like Gremlins running amok in a genetics laboratory, there’s particular aspects in life you just are powerless over. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin shares this wisdom. Sometimes, you have to follow their example: embrace the chaos, put everything you’ve got into canned food and shotguns and try not to view the world with undue solemnity.

It’s strong life advice from a very unlikely source – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my comfort movie.